HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU'RE OLD AND DON'T MOVE FAST ANYMORE

George  Phillips, an elderly man from Walled Lake, Michigan, was  going up to bed, when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in  the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George  opened the back door to go turn off the light, but saw that there were  people in the shed stealing things.

He phoned the police, who  asked "Is someone in your house?"

He  said "No," but some people are breaking into my garden shed and stealing  from me.

Then  the police dispatcher said "All patrols are busy. You should lock your  doors and an officer will be along when one is available."

George  said, "Okay." He hung up the phone and counted to 30. Then he phoned the  police again.

"Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago  because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well, you don't  have to worry about them now because I just shot and killed them both;  the dogs are eating them right now," and he hung up.

Within  five minutes, six Police Cars, a SWAT Team, a Helicopter,  two Fire Trucks, a Paramedic and an Ambulance showed up at the Phillips'  residence, and caught the burglars red-handed.

One of the  Policemen said to George, "I thought you said that you'd shot  them!"

George  said, "I thought you said there was nobody available!"

(True  Story)

I LOVE IT!
Don't  mess with old people.