New Year Humor

What did a caterpillar do on New Year's Day? – It turns over a new leaf.



What’s once in a minute, twice in a moment, and never in a thousand years? - The letter M!



Did you hear about the three million dollar Redneck Lottery? - The winner gets three dollars a year for a million years.



What do vampires sing on New Year's Eve? - Auld Fang Syne!



Why did the man refuse to eat snails? - He only ate fast food.



Why do dragons sleep during the day? - So they can fight knights.



Why was the queen's room flooded? - Because she reigned for many years!



And,



What does the dentist of the year get? - A little plaque.