The Story Of Sh*t

Talkin’ Sh*t

Anonymous e-mail (edited by BFH)

The folks who are getting free shit don’t like the folks
who are paying for the free shit because the folks who are paying for
the free shit can no longer afford to pay for both the free shit and
their own shit. And this is creating a shitstorm.

The folks who are paying for the free shit want the free
shit to stop, and the the folks who are getting the free shit want even
more free shit on top of the free shit they are already getting.

Now, the people who are forcing the people who pay for the
free shit have told the people who are receiving the free shit that
the people who are paying for the free shit are the problem.

So, the people who are getting the free shit resent the people who are paying for the free shit because of the smears by the people who are forcing other people to pay for the free shit.

Can you believe this shit?
We have let the free shit giving go on for so long that there
are now more people getting free shit than paying for the free shit.

Now understand this, all great democracies have committed
financial suicide somewhere between 200 and 250 years after being
founded. The reason? The voters figure out they could vote themselves
free shit by electing people who promised to give them
free shit in exchange for electing them.

The United States officially became a Republic in 1776, 231
years ago. The number of people now getting free shit outnumber the
people paying for the free shit. We have one chance to change that in
2012. Failure to change that spells the end of the United States as we
know it.

ELECTION 2012 IS COMING

Vote the Shit Out

Vote a Conservative In

[no sh*t!]

How is this hot dog like the U.S. economy?

Obama turned them both into shit.

President Obama wolfs down TWO chili dogs and fries... the day after his wife unveils new dietary guide.

Obama's new plan: RAPE

Dear American Citizens,

Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in the economy, I, President Barack Obama have decided to implement a plan to put all workers of 50 years of age and above on early retirement.

This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early). Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to Congress to be considered for the SHAFT scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination).

Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (Scheme Covering Retired-Early Workers).

A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as I, President Obama, deem appropriate.

Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependants & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).

Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by me, President Obama.

Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. I, President Obama have always prided myself on the amount of SHIT I give our citizens.

Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring this to the attention of your Congressman, who has been trained to give you all the SHIT you can handle.

Sincerely,

President Barack Hussein Obama

P.S.
Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.